Counterfeit Monkey — 229 of 292

Emily Short

Release 5

Section 4 - D

The heft of the daft document is 2. The description of the daft document is "It's a long print-off from a website, concerning the virtues of the [i]toxi waste[/i] scheme, complete with instructions about how to forward your money and lobby your representatives, if any."

The heft of the dart document is 2. The description of the dart document is "The dart document provides a set of rules and regulations for professional dart competitions, including minimum distance to the board, heft and design of the darts themselves, size and arrangement of the dartboard point areas, and so on."

The heft of the dig is 20. The description of the dig is "It's a large affair: not child's a dig in the garden or even an archaeological dig undertaken with shovels and picks, but a massive industrial dig, the kind that happens beneath a major American city that didn't have the foresight to put down subways in 1890 when it would have been cheaper.

There's mud and stone and a cylindrical drilling machine five stories high."

The description of the diva is "Though I couldn't put a name to her, we both feel as though we've seen her face many times on the sides of many buildings[if the diva wears the meat-gown]. She is wearing glamorous dress decorated with slabs of meat[end if][if the diva wears the bacon chapeau]. On her head is an eye-catching bacon chapeau[end if]."

The diva wears a meat-gown and a bacon chapeau. Understand "glamorous" or "glamourous" or "dress" or "gown" or "meat" or "meat-studded" or "studded" as the meat-gown. The printed name of the meat-gown is "meat studded gown". The description of the meat-gown is "You could feed a dozen starving steak-enthusiasts with this."

The description of the bacon chapeau is "People sometimes pin bacon on turkeys to keep them moist during roasting. It looks as though the diva's milliner has taken the same approach to her head." The bacon chapeau is edible. Understand "hat" as the bacon chapeau.

Test diva with "switch switch / put dove in bucket / x diva / x gown / x chapeau / load gun / shoot gown / shoot chapeau / x diva" holding the dove and the anagramming gun and the bullets in the Generator Room.

The doe is an animal. The doe is female. The heft of the doe is 6. "A doe lurks nervously nearby." The description is "She looks very skittish."

The printed name of the secret-door is "door". Understand "door" as the secret-door. The description of the secret-door is "It is part of the north wall[if secret-door is closed], and currently closed[otherwise]. It stands ajar[end if]." The secret-door is an openable, closed, enterable container. It is fixed in place.

Carry out opening the secret-door:

now the Oracle Project is mapped north of Wonderland;

now Wonderland is mapped south of the Oracle Project;

follow the compass-drawing rule.

Carry out closing the secret-door:

remove door passage.

To remove door passage:

now the Oracle Project is not mapped north of Wonderland;

now Wonderland is not mapped south of the Oracle Project;

now the secret-door is closed;

follow the compass-drawing rule.

A dangerous destruction rule for the secret-door:

remove door passage.

Report opening the secret-door:

say "[You] open the door, revealing a room beyond." instead.

Instead of entering the secret-door:

try going north.

The doper crow is a bird. The description of the doper crow is "It looks much like any other crow, except for a lethargy around the eyes, and a despondent silence in place of the usual cawing."

Instead of showing the doper crow to Poe:

say "From his disdainful expression, he can obviously tell it's just a crow and not a proper raven."

The dope cow is an animal. The heft of the dope cow is 7. Understand "purple spots" or "spots" or "lip" or "udder" or "piercing" as the dope cow. The description of the dope cow is "A cow, but with really bad-ass purple spots, and a knowing, cow-of-the-world curl to its lip. The udder piercing is an eye-catcher."

Check waving the letter-remover at the dope cow when the current setting of the letter-remover is "p":

say "A doe cow would presumably be some interesting genetic chimera, but the letter-remover isn't up to bringing it about." instead.