Counterfeit Monkey — 232 of 292

Emily Short

Release 5

Section 7 - I through L

The printed name of a self-object is "I". Understand "I" as a self-object. The description of a self-object is "It's an abstract that looks like a bit of mirror. When I look at it I see Alex, my proper self, and not just restored to my usual body, but photo-retouched to be that bit smarter and freer of skin-blemishes, well-dressed. It's like looking in the mirror at reality as it should be.

You doubtless see yourself too [--] as you are, or perhaps as you want to be." Rule for printing the plural name of a self-object: say "Is". The self-object is r-abstract.

Test ibug with "tutorial off / autoupgrade / wave p-remover at pill / wave l-remover at ill / wave i-remover at I" holding the pill.

The ice-wig japes are an r-abstract thing. The printed name is "ice wig japes". Understand "ice wig" as the ice-wig japes. The description is "It displays, in miniature, some kind of comedy routine involving a set of ice skaters passing back and forth a huge wig also made of solid ice, which they take it in turns to wear (no doubt uncomfortably) over their caps."

Some ills are r-abstract. The description of ills is usually "They manifest as little balls of malevolence, like the critters that flew out of Pandora's box in a children's illustration."

An ill is r-abstract. The description of an ill is usually "It manifests as a little ball of malevolence, like a palm-sized thundercloud. It looks like it's a generic item from phrases like 'to wish someone ill,' which is a mercy; I don't think I would have liked manifesting illness, even abstractly.

Periodically it gains cartoonish eyes and eyebrows, and glowers at us."

[Not actually in the repository at present — too easy?]

An in-object is r-abstract. The printed name is "in". The description is usually "It represents the idea of having a connection or a way in to a normally closed institution. What my father would call networking and Slango would call nepotism, and my mother would have no name for at all because to her it is the normal way of the world everywhere.

At the moment, this concept is embodied as a pair of abstract hands clasped in a handshake."


The inapt sin is r-abstract. The heft of the inapt sin is 0. The description of the inapt sin is "It displays a very puritanical man praying on a street corner: the sin of spiritual pride, perhaps."

The inapt tint is r-abstract. The description of the inapt tint is "The tint hovers in the air, a translucent vibrating cloud, and always manages to take on just the col[our] that will most disagree with its background."

An ink is usually contained and fluid. The indefinite article is "some". The description is usually "It's a blue-black ink derived from squid or cuttlefish, in a small bottle."

Understand "write [text] with [ink]" as a mistake ("Ink like this requires the right kind of pen; we neither have nor need such a thing.").

The infertile astrologer is a woman. The description of the infertile astrologer is "She's a woman with long grey hair, well past menopause." Understand "woman" as the infertile astrologer.

The greeting of the infertile astrologer is "'This meeting was predicted in the stars,' the astrologer informs us."

Every turn when the infertile astrologer is in the location:

if a random chance of 1 in 2 succeeds:

say "[one of]'Mercury is in retrograde,' comments the astrologer. 'Expect disordered communications.'[or]The astrologer looks at us. 'Gemini, am I right?'[or]'Today is a day of revelation,' announces the astrologer.[or]'We concern ourselves with the colonial tents,' the astrologer admits.[in random order]".

The printed name of the intaglio-pins is "intaglio pins". Understand "intaglio" or "pins" or "pin" as the intaglio-pins. The intaglio-pins are wearable. The description of the intaglio-pins is "A collection of crystal pins, with cameos of great figures carved into the backs of the crystal to give the impression (from the front) of a bust in low relief. They look like elegant antiques, if not worth a hundredth the value of the paintings."

The printed name of the intaglio-pin is "intaglio pin". Understand "intaglio" or "pin" as the intaglio-pin. The intaglio-pin is wearable. The description of the intaglio-pin is "A single crystal pin, with a cameo of Jon Rosehip carved into the backs of the crystal to give the impression (from the front) of a bust in low relief."

The printed name of the intaglio-pint is "intaglio pint". Understand "intaglio" or "pint" as the intaglio-pint. The intaglio-pint is a container. The description of the intaglio-pint is "A crystal pint glass etched with the face of famous Atlanteans. It is the sort of thing you can by at a souvenir shop if you have a lot more money than sense."

The indefinite article of the ire is "some". The description of the ire is "It manifests as a jaggy haze, through which [you] can see images of [one of]the triplicate Bureau paperwork required to dig foundations for any new building (requiring firm proof that no unwelcome archaeological discoveries will result)[or]the price tag on a bottle of Russian vodka around here[or]a postcard from traveling friends, in which the Bureau has carefully black-inked out everything except the photo[at random].". The ire is r-abstract.

Rule for clarifying the parser's choice of the it-object: do nothing instead.

The printed name of an it-object is "it". Understand "it" or "pronoun" as an it-object. The description of an it-object is "It's itself. It. The epitome of itness. Philosophers would pay millions." An it-object is r-abstract.

When play begins:

let target be a random it-object;

let second target be a random tit;

move target to repository;

move second target to repository. [This should guarantee tit/it toggles frequently.]

The jack is a long strong thing. The description is "A heavy-duty jack, suitable for raising cars or other substantial objects."

[add: use jack on portcullis, put jack under portcullis, jack portcullis, raise portcullis with jack, raise portcullis]

The jackass is a man. The description is "He's a middle-aged fellow with a yellowing smile. His eyes are unfriendly, and he's looking us over very suspiciously. Taking the least charitable possible view of everyone else's motives, then going off on offensive rants: that'll be his personal specialty."

The greeting of the jackass is "'Suppose you brought me here to hit me up for money,' says the jackass sourly. 'Might've known.'"

The jigsaw is a device. Understand "tool" as the jigsaw. The description is "It's a portable power saw with the ability to slice right through wood or plastic. Dewalt cordless, if you're interested, with a massive battery."

Carry out switching on the jigsaw:

now the jigsaw is noisy.

Carry out switching off the jigsaw:

now the jigsaw is not noisy.

Instead of listening to the jigsaw when the jigsaw is switched on:

say "There is a continuous angry whine from the jigsaw."

Test jigbug with "tutorial off / unmonkey / w / turn on jigsaw / w / drop jigsaw / w" holding the jigsaw and the keycard in the Johnson Basement.

The jigsaw-piece is a thing. Understand "jigsaw piece" or "jigsaw" or "piece" as the jigsaw-piece. The printed name is "jigsaw piece". The description is "A single mislaid piece from a jigsaw puzzle. It shows part of a woman's face contorted with strong emotion."

The keycard is a passkey. It unlocks the small door. The description is "An electronic pass card with a powerful-looking stripe down the back side." Understand "electronic" and "card" and "powerful-looking" and "stripe" and "powerful" as the keycard. The heft of the keycard is 1.

Carry out taking the keycard:

record "acquiring a keycard" as achieved.

The key-lime is an edible thing. The printed name is "key lime". Understand "key" or "lime" as the key-lime. The description is "One of those small, extra-flavorful limes used as a flavor for pie."

The scent-description is "sharp and citrusy".

The flavor-description is "The outer layer of skin tastes a little bit sharp, but most of the flavor is locked inside.".

Instead of squeezing the key-lime:

say "It is firm and juicy, but not squishy. Not over the hill yet."

The keyring is a supporter. The heft is 1. The description is "It's a souvenir keychain. The tag is printed with the outline of Anglophone Atlantis, and reads: 'Atlantis: Friendly to Business - Friendly to Life.'"

Instead of putting something which is not the gel on the keyring:

say "Only keys can really be attached."

The kind ladies are a plural-named woman. The description of the kind ladies is "They appear extremely earnest and helpful [--] some maternal, others more like that well-meaning aunt who is always asking if you need help with things because she really hasn't got anything to do at home."

The greeting of the kind ladies is "They look at us and wave, regal little waves."

The kudu is an animal. The description of the kudu is "It's a creature like an antelope, with tall, twisting horns and a little white tuft of beard."

Every turn when the kudu is visible and the kudu is in the location:

say "The kudu looks at us cleverly for a moment and then bounds away.";

remove the kudu from play.

The heft of the lab-thing is 10. The description of the lab-thing is "A full-sized scientific research laboratory, one of the many owned by Dental Consonants Limited." The printed name of the lab-thing is "lab". Understand "lab" or "laboratory" as the lab-thing.

The lam is r-abstract. The description of the lam is "The abstract image of being on the lam. A pair of leg-irons lies discarded on the ground. A man runs through the woods. A marshall organizes a team to follow him. There's a sequence involving a chase through sewers and another involving some fake identification. It all feels a little familiar for comfort."

The lamb is an animal. The description of the lamb is "He is white and fluffy, with a surprisingly long tail." The heft of the lamb is 3.

The description of the lamb-granulate is "One small nodule of dried concentrated lamb substance." The printed name of the lamb-granulate is "lamb granulate". Understand "granulate" as the lamb-granulate. Understand "lamb" as the lamb-granulate when the lamb is not visible.

The lap is r-abstract. It is an enterable supporter. It is portable. The description of the lap is "Reified rather non-specifically as 'something to sit on,' it comes out looking like an especially comfortable seat."

The lappet is a wearable thing. The description of the lappet is "A sort of collar with long droopy flaps, like women wear in very old photos."

The larger-pin is a wearable thing. The heft of the larger-pin is 2. The printed name is "larger pin". Understand "larger" or "larger pin" as the larger-pin. Understand "pin" as the larger-pin when the player cannot see the pin. The description is "It's a clunky, substantial piece of costume jewelry, made of brassy metal and enamel, ca. 1958. It depicts the letter T inset in a turning gear. At the bottom is the motto 'DCL WIFE.'"

The lass is a woman. The description of a lass is "She is dressed like a peasant and looks Scottish, but cheerful. She is not especially wee, but I suppose she answers to bonny."

The greeting of the lass is "She says hello in her most Scottish possible accent."

The description of the leaf is "An outsized tapering metal leaf from the olive branch of the statue of Atlantida. If the edges were sharper, it would resemble a curved dagger blade from some nomadic culture.". The heft of the leaf is 2. The leaf is long and strong.

The leap is r-abstract. The description is "A slightly fuzzy moving image of a ballerina performing the final grand leap from 'The Builders of Babel,' right before the lightning strikes."

The description of the lease is "A contract describing the terms of rental for some waterfront property east of the docks. Apparently large portions of this land are owned by the Bureau and leased out as long as no one digs there deeper than ten feet."

The description of the leases is "A sheaf of paperwork that might have come from any realtor on the island, detailing terms for six-month, one-year, or two-year contracts for various homes and office buildings." Understand "paperwork" as the leases.

The description of the lee is "It is the sheltered place beside a wall, or under a rock, or in the shadow of a tree: a place where the sun is not too hot, the rain not too driving, the wind not too strong.

On its own, without any wall, rock, or tree, the lee is a pathetic-looking object, but nonetheless useful." A lee is enterable and open. A lee is not openable. A lee is r-abstract.

The flexible appearance of the lee is "The lee is only discernable as a kind of shadow and stillness of the air, but it is definitely here. ".

Report dropping the lee:

say "[You] set up the lee against the nearest wall." instead.

Rule for describing the interior of the lee:

say "From inside the lee, all the noises around us are slightly hushed, and the air close to body temperature."

The description of a leer is "It is a good-hum[our]ed, slightly-drunk kind of leer, but it's unmistakable." The leer is r-abstract.

Instead of giving or showing the leer to a woman:

say "[one of][The second noun] looks very far from interested.[or]'In your dreams,' mutters [the second noun].[at random]".

Instead of giving or showing the leer to a man:

say "Somehow the effect just doesn't work."

The description of the legend is "This legend has been edited from its original form, replacing the words like HOSPITAL and RESTROOM with other, hand-written labels: INVITE, GOT, 11, OUT, T-INSERTER, etc. By arranging the words of the legend in the order in which the icons appear along the main street, we arrive at GOT INVITE T-INSERTER DEMONSTRATION. OUT 11 AM."

The introduction of the legend is "Of course, it's already long past 11 AM, so Brock's plan clearly went wrong. If we're going to go after him, we'll have to go to the T-inserter demonstration ourselves. The catch is that, as dangerous new technology, it's held inside the Bureau and requires a special invitation to enter.

I think I know where we can get one, though. My advisor Professor Waterstone [--] that's the person overseeing my graduate research [--] was also invited to this demonstration. We might be able to get his[advance-goals]."

To say advance-goals:

complete "Homonym-paddle the legend into the other kind of legend";

assign "Speak to Professor Waterstone and get his invitation to see the T-inserter" at Waterstone's Office;

assign "Gain entrance to the Bureau" at Rotunda;

assign "Find Brock" at Sensitive Equipment Testing Room;

To say figure-out-legend:

complete "Trace Brock's movements at the antique shop";

assign "Homonym-paddle the legend into the other kind of legend" at Drinks Club.

The lie is r-abstract. The description of the lie is "It changes from moment to moment. Currently it reads: [line break][relevant lie][if rule succeeded][one of][paragraph break]Hm. Awkward item, isn't it? Make a nice conversation piece for the home. Set it on the mantelpiece and watch it gossip about your guests.[or][stopping][otherwise][one of][paragraph break]Not very inventive of it.[or][stopping][end if]"

[Originally there were a bunch of other randomized lies that said untrue things about the world model. But these were not really as entertaining as the pointed, custom-rolled lies, so eventually I deleted the others.]

To say relevant lie:

say italic type;

say "[one of]This mission is going without a hitch[or]The two of you are very well-suited co-conspirators[or]Alex has no qualms about Andra's moral [if the player wears the Britishizing goggles]fibre[otherwise]fiber[end if][or]Andra is absolutely not thinking of stabbing Alex in the back later[or]Brock has no feelings for Andra[or]Slango is a wise and harmless father-figure[or]Andra misses her parents[or]There won't be any difficulty in separating you two later[or]Person-synthesis is completely safe[or]I am carried by a sensible person[or]You wouldn't ever believe any of the things I say[or]You will definitely get away with this[at random].[no line break]";

say roman type;

rule succeeds.

The printed name of the lime-powder is "lime". Understand "powder" or "lime" as the lime-powder. The description of the lime-powder is "A heap of dry chalky powder." The indefinite article of the lime-powder is "some".

Some litotes are an r-abstract thing. The description is "A not unimpressive figure of speech."

Sanity-check smelling litotes:

say "The litotes is not unfree of scent." instead.

Sanity-check drinking litotes:

say "Litotes is not unlike a gas or form of air." instead.

Sanity-check attacking litotes:

say "Fine. Litotes is a wordy rhetorical structure and can come off sounding over-fancy." instead.

The description of the live branch is "A substantial branch torn from some living tree. The leaves are green, delicate and tapering."

The loaf is edible. The description of the loaf is "Fancy white bread with caraway seeds in."

The louse is an insect. The heft of the louse is 1. Understand "lice" as the louse. The description of the louse is "Ick."